Awareness

Awash…

As each wave comes ashore, along the way it covers all that is lower lying. Sometimes stacking up, it covers higher ground too. Then as it recedes, it pulls back toward the ocean all that is loose or unanchored, leaving a murky mixture of unsettled sand and water behind.

The movement is constant, the intensity waxing and waning, turning motion into commotion at times. Yet, standing in the water, witnessing and experiencing the ebb and flow, toes, then feet and more, under water, swaying… sometimes shifting for better footing, sometimes falling over, but ultimately finding the way, and keeping balance amid conditions of low visibility.  So much like the days we are in, so much tossed about, up in the air, or sinking.

Still though, in between the waves, and even within, there is Hope. There are always moments of clarity where despite murky water all around, the anchor, tried and true, still holds, and the floor of sand with its assorted pebbles, rocks, and shells can be seen. For water that moves always comes clean. Always, always, refreshing the soul… renewing the heart.

May God enlighten the eyes of our hearts,
that we may know what is the hope
that belongs to our call. – Ephesians 1:18

Awash

Leaning into Peace…

A couple of years ago, I came across this large rock while at a retreat house.

Peace

While the word “Peace” is noticeably engraved toward the top of the stone, not so easily seen are the words engraved toward the bottom left side of it. “In verdant pastures He gives one rest.” These words are reminiscent of Psalm 23, which begins, “The Lord is my shepherd; there is nothing I lack.”

At first glance the rock appears to suggest that peace is an uphill battle. However, despite the fact that it may seem that way, both on this rock and at times in life, perhaps more than anything, it is an invitation. One must remember that Peace is not a destination, but rather a companion on the journey.

As we climb the mountain, the Lord is by our side, solid like a rock, firmly in place, and the peace we find depends upon all that we hold in our hearts and to Whom we lean into, as well as in Whom we rest.

The Lord is my shepherd;
there is nothing I lack.
In green pastures he makes me lie down;
to still waters he leads me;
he restores my soul.
He guides me along right paths
for the sake of his name.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil, for you are with me;
your rod and your staff comfort me.
You set a table before me
in front of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Indeed, goodness and mercy will pursue me
all the days of my life;
I will dwell in the house of the Lord
for endless days. – Psalm 23    

To the Limit…

Under the best of circumstances there are moments that can stretch one to what feels like the end of the line or heading into an abyss. Over the past several months enduring all that has come with the COVID-19 pandemic, on top of the more typical challenges of life, has added entirely new layers to our existence. In many ways, one might say that we are often being pushed to our limits.

When the prophet, Elijah, stepped out from the safety of the cave, he did so trusting the voice of God that called upon him to do so. Prior to reaching Horeb and the cave within it, Elijah, his life in danger for being a vessel of Truth, had fled Samaria and was “on the run” for 40 days and nights. In the First Book of Kings, chapter 19, verse 4, when he says, “Enough, Lord! Take my life, for I am no better than my ancestors.” it certainly seems he has reached his breaking point or been pushed to the brink of what he can tolerate.

However, it is exactly at this point, that Elijah finds respite, laying down, or taking a break. What looks like the end, as is often the case, becomes a new or different beginning, a new leg of the journey. After some sleep, a messenger of the Lord wakes Elijah up and prompts him to eat and drink, and then keep moving on. Under the direction of God, eventually, he arrives at the place, another place, where he meets God once again.

This many thousands of years later, trying as well as unimaginable days still exist, and they are experienced by one and all, in various ways, across the world…across the universe. Yet, at the very same time, there is God, in the urgent fleeing of Elijah, the messenger along the way, in each and every step toward the mountain and into the cave. There is God, constant… continuing presence, through great winds, the quaking of the earth, and in the burning of the fire.

And, also, there is God in the whisperings of the day, beckoning to all who might listen… endless opportunities to recognize, and face, the limits of our patience or understanding. There are so many ways to discover the essence of who we are called to be, and to seek the courage to stand up, come forward to the entrance of the cave, and be true to the Vision.

ToTheLimit

At the mountain of God, Horeb,
Elijah came to a cave where he took shelter.
Then the LORD said to him,
“Go outside and stand on the mountain before the LORD;
the LORD will be passing by.”
A strong and heavy wind was rending the mountains
and crushing rocks before the LORD—
but the LORD was not in the wind.
After the wind there was an earthquake—
but the LORD was not in the earthquake.
After the earthquake there was fire—
but the LORD was not in the fire.
After the fire there was a tiny whispering sound.
When he heard this,
Elijah hid his face in his cloak
and went and stood at the entrance of the cave. – 1 Kings 19:9A, 11-13A

Reach…

The rays of light poured forth from the sun, extending toward the sea before carrying on and making their way across the water. Then from there, onto the shore, absorbing all in its path, catching passersby, and filling with gratitude, awe and inspiration, each willing soul along the way.

Sometimes getting from one side to the other is easier said than done. Today I found myself thinking about a day, a number of years ago, that I had to fly out of state to do a training session. It had been a productive day, moving right along with no hitches, but still it was a long day and at the end, I could not wait to be home again. However, the return trip was unexpectedly delayed. I remember checking in and boarding the flight, and feeling relieved as the plane began to depart from the gate. I was thinking that soon we would be in the air and less than a couple of hours later reaching the destination. All was good.

Continuing on, we began to move forward, and we kept moving, but without picking up speed. Then, the plane came to a halt, and remained halted on the tarmac for a number of hours. All passengers confined to their seats, I remember feeling more than a little upset as the time standing there, still, grew longer and longer.

Feeling so stuck, it was hard not to wonder, why? Why did the plane pull away from the gate, leaving one and all stranded, with nowhere to go? What is going on? Why are we waiting here? How long will it be?

Eventually, a far time from departing from the gate, the plane was able to take off. I found myself feeling so thankful along the way, upon landing and deplaning, and even more grateful, upon arriving home and climbing into my bed that late night/early morning. Thinking back on that trip, I remember at first feeling defeated in those long moments of waiting. The situation at hand invasive, threatening to wash away the prior, more pleasant happenings of the day. Then, as the time passed, sifting through various thoughts and feelings, somewhere in between, I remember letting go and arriving at a different destination—peace. All was good.

Back then, I did not understand. Since then, I have come to see. The tarmac, what seemed an empty wasteland, the place of being stuck or just waiting and waiting, held the same peace I was longing for at home. Yet, it was only able to reach me, and me it, in my letting go.

Most often what is waiting in between, the in between—Peace—is what gets one through.

Peace, always reaching out, longing to be held.

Peace, a treasure, seeking to be sought, but more than often not.

Peace, always near, always here, wandering care. 

Peace, destined for each other, like the calling of a mother.

Reach

Resonance…

Recently, there have been a number of times, when looking out the window, the birds that are usually fluttering and moving from one spot in the yard to another, have been awfully still. They have been hanging around in one area of the grass or perched on a branch much longer than usual. Then yesterday afternoon, another of our frequent visitors, a rabbit, was not just eating, but was also sprawled out, as if reclining on the grass as it was eating. I had never seen that before and found it rather curious. Then I thought, it must be hurt, but it wasn’t. After watching for a minute or two, I went off to do something else, and when I returned, the rabbit was in its more usual, upright position.

Today, sitting at the kitchen island, it is not long before I become aware of the ticking of the clock or the buzzing of messages received by cell. Even in another spot, not long before there is something else calling attention or looking to be tended to, remembered not forgotten. And while I may perceive these all as I go about my way, sometimes at a quickened pace, sometimes still, others passing through and moving on, it is only when I really stop and take the time to listen, that my heart can open up not only to hear, but also to remember, the Truth beyond the mission.

Earlier this week, I came across the following prayer. A great reminder of all the reasons why—The Reason why. It is by John Henry Cardinal Newman, whose motto was “Cor ad cor loquitur” or “Heart speaks to heart.” It’s about all that matters…

Dear Jesus, help me to spread your fragrance everywhere I go;
Flood my soul with your spirit and life;
Penetrate and possess my whole being so completely
That all my life may be only a radiance of yours;
Shine through me and be so in me
That everyone with whom I come into contact
May feel your presence within me.
Let them look up and see no longer me—but only Jesus.
Amen.

– Saint John Henry Newman

BlueJay1

Drawing Wise…

Drawing, in its various forms, is something that all people tend to do. Although not necessarily the kind of drawing that is by hand, certainly the kind of drawing that informs or leads to conclusions, maybe even actions.

Stepping outside, I am drawn to the beauty of the trees and the composition spread across the sky. After a period of pause, I am moved to capture, or at least try, and then to share the scene.

Throughout each day, there are moments of drawing, being drawn in, and opportunities to take notice. In those moments and following them, what happens?

In the Book of Sirach, it is written:

With all your soul draw close to Wisdom;
and with all your strength keep her ways.
Inquire and search, seek and find;
when you get hold of her, do not let her go.
Thus at last you will find rest in her,
and she will become your joy. – Sirach 6:26-28

In a world so steeped in competition, mastering the art of out-preparing, and getting “there” first, Wisdom can seem so elusive. And sometimes, to wait for it, may seem a strategy for those who are passive, or even worse, it may seem like forfeiture or a giving up. Yet, Wisdom knows all too well, waiting is not for the faint of heart.

Saint Augustine wrote, “Patience is the companion of wisdom.” In current times, patience seems to wear thin, and in moving about, it can seem as if all are strangers in a strange land. There are so many twists and turns, and maneuvering and holding on among competing interests, can easily find its way toward the never lasting.

To this, Wisdom says:

Look around for all that is worthwhile;
“faithful in words and holy in works” (Psalm 145:13).
Be drawn into each experience,
and from it, draw,
but only that which is worthwhile;
“faithful in words and holy in works.”

Wisdom is all around, but, oh, how often, one misses this, while going after “that.”

Wisdom

We never know how high we are
Till we are called to rise;
And then, if we are true to plan,
Our statures touch the skies.

The heroism we recite
Would be a daily thing,
Did not ourselves the cubits warp
For fear to be a king.  – Emily Dickinson, We Never Know How High We Are (1176)

Peace, piece by piece…

As we remain afloat in a sea of COVID-19 and political, social, and financial unrest, we are in the midst of much that aspires to debilitate and obliterate. As it carries on, sometimes it can seem like this state of disarray could go on forever. However, despite it all, progress comes as waves of truth and courage continue to rise. More and more join in, standing up and speaking out, seeking to overcome the past, and to affect long awaited change.

Sometimes, it is a matter of coming to see, that as the big things knock us out or push us back, our peace lies in the little things. The little things, like the way a squirrel gathers acorns, one at a time, teach us wisdom and move us forward. Step after step, it is the little things and all that is in between, that truly push us ahead and lead us to the places where we need to be.

“It’s the little details that are vital. Little things make big things happen.” – John Wooden

Sql

On Deck…

In a time and place where focus can often be drawn toward what’s next or what’s on deck, there stands Epiphany, ever calling one back, gently, to pause in the Light.

Seeing that careful observation was part of their daily practice, those who were called wise, not only saw the sign, but were also aware of its significance and moved by it into action.

We saw his star at its rising and have come to do him homage. – Matthew 2:2

According to Scripture, the magi came from the east and journeyed over the course of days and nights, and then some more days and nights, not knowing the exact destination. Yet, they remained faithful, eventually reaching the place to which they were guided.

Path

What about those from the west? And those already there? Did they also see the star from its rising? What signs did they see or hear? Were they too closed, or too quick to assume that what they were waiting and looking for, could not possibly be in their midst already?

What, if anything, did they recognize?

See, darkness covers the earth,
and thick clouds cover the peoples;
but upon you the LORD shines,
and over you appears his glory. – Isaiah 60:2

Epiphany

The Heart That Seeks…

At the beginning of the second chapter of the Book of the prophet Isaiah, it is written that the people of all nations shall strive together toward the house of the Lord, saying:

“Come, let us climb the Lord’s mountain,
to the house of the God of Jacob,
that we may be instructed in God’s ways,
and we may walk in God’s paths.” (verse 3)

In the Gospel according to Matthew, chapter 24, verses 37-44, in speaking to the disciples about being prepared for the day of the Lord, Jesus says,

“Two men will be out in the field;
one will be taken, and one will be left.
Two women will be grinding at the mill;
one will be taken, and one will be left” (verses 40-41).

On the surface, to the human eye, or mind, there is no discernible difference between the one who is taken and the one who is left in this passage. And, in the end, only God truly knows.

However, Jesus seems to be making the point that it does not matter what one does. It does not matter whether one “falls in line” (or out), but rather the reason for doing so, or not, is what matters. That is, what is in one’s heart? What is one preparing, or preparing for? And, who is really being served, and how so?

Returning to the prophet Isaiah, it is clear, many nations and many people. Also, many are the ways and the paths of God. Again, only God truly knows. Yet, while the exact time and place, and what lies ahead, may be a mystery, the heart that seeks is always connected, helping one to be awake to the pulse of the Spirit.

There is no need to look for God here or there. He is no farther away than the door of your own heart. – Meister Eckhart

RiseUp

Jesus said to his disciples:
“As it was in the days of Noah,
so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.
In those days before the flood,
they were eating and drinking,
marrying and giving in marriage,
up to the day that Noah entered the ark.
They did not know until the flood came and carried them all away.
So will it be also at the coming of the Son of Man.
Two men will be out in the field;
one will be taken, and one will be left.
Two women will be grinding at the mill;
one will be taken, and one will be left.
Therefore, stay awake!
For you do not know on which day your Lord will come.
Be sure of this: if the master of the house
had known the hour of night when the thief was coming,
he would have stayed awake
and not let his house be broken into.
So too, you also must be prepared,
for at an hour you do not expect, the Son of Man will come.” – Matthew 24:37-44

Reserved Seating…

Beginning in the early years of life, one comes to see that seating can be tricky, sometimes even turning contentious. From a very young age, many children are introduced to musical chairs. To be first (often synonymous with best) and beat out others in securing a coveted seat, of which there are too few, is the goal of the game. If you do not get a seat, you’re out of the game—eliminated.

Across the years as well as across various different areas of life, securing a “good” seat seemingly remains a key to many things. Whether one is attending an event related to school, sports, dinner, entertainment, travel, the celebration of milestones, etc., it seems human nature to aim for a seat with a prime view. In the Gospel according to Luke (chapter 14: 7-14), Jesus encourages us to refrain from this way of being and not to take the coveted seat, or hold it for those who are held in esteem or known to us.

Rather than aiming to obtain a particular spot, or slide into a position, we are to trust that what is passed up or given away, if it is truly for us, will come back to us. In addition, Jesus instructs us to be gracious, making room physically, as well as in our hearts and minds, for others. Calling us to look at and examine our reservations. What are the spots being held back or blocked off? What is preventing seating for all?

FerrisWheel

He told a parable to those who had been invited,
noticing how they were choosing the places of honor at the table.
“When you are invited by someone to a wedding banquet,
do not recline at table in the place of honor.
A more distinguished guest than you may have been invited by him,
and the host who invited both of you may approach you and say,
‘Give your place to this man,’
and then you would proceed with embarrassment
to take the lowest place.
Rather, when you are invited,
go and take the lowest place
so that when the host comes to you he may say,
‘My friend, move up to a higher position.’
Then you will enjoy the esteem of your companions at the table.
For every one who exalts himself will be humbled,
but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”
Then he said to the host who invited him,
“When you hold a lunch or a dinner,
do not invite your friends or your brothers
or your relatives or your wealthy neighbors,
in case they may invite you back and you have repayment.
Rather, when you hold a banquet,
invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind;
blessed indeed will you be because of their inability to repay you.
For you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.” – Luke 14:7-14