Hope

Hope and Light in Darkness…

This week I had the opportunity to share in an experience called an Advent spiral walk. The evening started with hot cider and light fare followed by song, beautifully led by acoustic guitar and, at first by the voice of one singing, and then several. As it progressed, and we bundled up and walked outside, into the evening, it only got better.

In the cold air and in darkness, guided only by candlelight, we proceeded to reflect on Advent, a time of waiting…waiting in darkness…but also in hope. As we sat around the spiral, singing, “In the Advent Garden, Dark the night below, Earth is waiting, waiting, waiting for the stars to glow…oh,” and as I listened to the guitar chords and the voices, I found myself so taken with the beauty of it all. One by one, each person…each pilgrim…stood up and prayerfully walked the spiral to the center. Once there, he or she, paused, lit their candle, and then placed it along the path on the walk back out from the center.

As I looked up at the stars above, and then back to the group and the spiral, looking at the area that was once dark now becoming lighter, I found myself filled with hope and joy. As I reflected on the words spoken earlier, “the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it” (from John 1:5), I found myself feeling grateful to God for the light placed within each of us and for each person in my life, and along my journey, who has shared their light with me and others.

How wonderful! Even in the darkness, there is light. Advent…waiting with hope and in hope…it is not just this time of year, but also throughout the year. Sometimes I wonder, am I waiting for God or, is it God who is waiting for me? Sometimes, I think it is both.

Either way, whether I am waiting for God or God is waiting for me…the sun always returns, and the light returns, as we wait together.

“Thus says the Lord GOD,
the Holy One of Israel:
O people of Zion, who dwell in Jerusalem,
no more will you weep;
He will be gracious to you when you cry out,
as soon as he hears he will answer you.
The Lord will give you the bread you need
and the water for which you thirst.
No longer will your Teacher hide himself,
but with your own eyes you shall see your Teacher,
While from behind, a voice shall sound in your ears:
‘This is the way; walk in it,’
when you would turn to the right or to the left.”  – Is 30:19-21

Take Flight and Soar…

If today you hear God’s voice, harden not your hearts. – Psalm 98:5

While I was searching for a photo, I came across a few that one of my brothers-in-law had taken and sent to the family a couple of years ago…an eagle taking flight.

Looking at the images, “God is in charge.” These are the words that pop into my mind. Such a freeing thought. God is in charge. God who created the eagle and not only gave it wings to fly, but also to soar. As I ponder how magnificent it is to see the eagle take flight and soar, I believe that God has the same in mind for all creation. How inspiring, filled with hope, and so grateful to God it makes me feel.

There is excitement as I step in to all that this day holds, both the known and the unknown. I wonder, “Will I recognize the gifts and blessings around me in the midst of all that is on my plate today? How will I cooperate with God?” Then I stop myself. I call myself back to the eagle in flight, about to soar, and I think, “Let go and let God.” How freeing!

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Photos courtesy of DMB

Remembering…

“Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least.” – Goethe

November…leaves falling, crisp cold air, fireplaces rolling…a time of harvest…a time of thanksgiving…a time of remembrance. As I adjust to shorter days and longer nights, I reflect on all that is and remember all that has passed. It is interesting how time can change things.

What once seemed so far away is closer with each hour…with each day…with each year. What once seemed insurmountable is now but a memory…a valued piece of history along the journey. As I look back, there is sadness…there is joy…but mostly there is gratitude.

From the old…

For I know well the plans I have in mind for you says the Lord,
plans for your welfare and not for woe,
so as to give you a future of hope.
When you call me, and come and pray to me, I will listen to you.
When you look for me, you will find me.
Yes, when you seek me with all your heart,
I will let you find me… – Jeremiah 29:11-14

What remains is truly priceless—memories…love…and so many blessings, far more rich than and more loudly…more deeply than the hurts and the disappointments.

To the new…

But as it is written:
“What eye has not seen, and ear has not heard,
and what has not entered the human heart,
what God has prepared for those who love him.” – 1 Corinthians 2:9

Constancy, an unwavering presence, love and hope for the future. A heart capable of seeing new adventures…exciting perhaps daunting or unexpected at times, but also opportunities and potential blessings through whatever may lie ahead. A faith that has a history of overcoming…of surviving…of a Love that conquers all. While there may be plenty that is bigger or more powerful than me, there is nothing that is bigger or more powerful than my God.

It is all good. In God, we trust. All will be okay…the fight has already been won. God…Time…it is all thanksgiving.

On Time from The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran:

And an astronomer said, “Master, what of Time?”

And he answered:

You would measure time the measureless and the immeasurable.

You would adjust your conduct and even direct the course of your spirit according to hours and seasons.

Of time you would make a stream upon whose bank you would sit and watch its flowing.

Yet the timeless in you is aware of life’s timelessness,
And knows that yesterday is but today’s memory and tomorrow is today’s dream.

And that that which sings and contemplates in you is still dwelling within the bounds of that first moment which scattered the stars into space.

Who among you does not feel that his power to love is boundless?

And yet who does not feel that very love, though boundless, encompassed within the centre of his being, and moving not from love thought to love thought, nor from love deeds to other love deeds?

And is not time even as love is, undivided and placeless?

But if in your thought you must measure time into seasons, let each season encircle all the other seasons,

And let today embrace the past with remembrance and the future with longing.

A Time To Change…

A few weeks ago, I collected some chestnuts. They were ones that had fallen to the ground prematurely and were still in their green, prickly burl or shell. Initially I thought I would use shellac to preserve them. That did not work though. The shells still turned brown and the chestnut within, which was not yet fully developed, shrunk so that it rattles inside upon shaking the shell.

I went back to the same spot more recently and there was a windfall of fully developed beautiful, smooth, brown chestnuts on the grass all around these two chestnut trees. In addition, there were some green, prickly shells, bigger than the ones I had picked earlier. “A-ha!” I thought as I picked up as many chestnuts as I could hold as well as some of the shells. This time I would refrigerate them to try to preserve them.

Well, the chestnuts were preserved, but the green shells continued to ripen and eventually cracked open. Overall, it seemed that there was nothing that I could do to preserve the chestnut shells as I found them—green and prickly.

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However, each day as I looked in the refrigerator, I could see the green prickly shell gradually changing to brown. The prickles remained, but seams formed along the shell and eventually began to split open, revealing a smooth, beautiful chestnut inside. Looking back over the journey, I cannot help but think how cool it was to see what was waiting for me each day as I opened the refrigerator.                ChestnutShellBrnOpening

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In the end, I had chestnuts and shells exactly as they were meant to be. Not in my time, or exactly my way (preserved—green and prickly), but in God’s time and in God’s way. No sooner…no later…but perfect. How Divine!

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There is an appointed time for everything,
and a time for every affair under the heavens.
– Ecclesiastes 3:1

 

First Or Last, What Difference Does It Make?

At times, it can be hard to accept the instances in which the “good guy” finishes last. When I have played by the golden rules and held myself to moral and ethical standards, only to be stomped on, passed over, or finishing last to one who has not. In moments like that, it can be very tempting to let go of the higher road, to seek revenge and/or to set out to play, from now on, by the very rules that go against my grain.

While I could shift to a lower gear, possibly squash anyone along the path and “win” the next situation, I have to stop and ask myself, at what cost would I be doing so? When I ask myself, “Is it really worth it to me to become something other than my true self in order to ‘win?’ ” without fail, I find that it is not. The end does not justify the means; at least not for me.

Sometimes I wonder, what does winning even really mean? To some, it seems to mean having or achieving more than others do and being the king or queen of the jungle, even if it requires words and actions that are ruthless and that cut down others. To some, it seems to mean striving to live life well, to be compassionate and loving, to be honest and to have integrity with oneself and others.

“We don’t have to be superstars or win championships….
All we have to do is learn to rise to every occasion, give our best effort,
and make those around us better as we do it.” — John Wooden

Although there is an “i” (actually two of them) in the word winning, when “I” is at the center of the way in which one operates, chances are that those around that person are not being made better. Instead, they are being driven away or encouraged in ways that are self-serving and that pave the way toward the decay of genuine character.

So what am I to do when the unjust occurs? If it is within me, and the words and actions arise into consciousness, stand up and speak up for what is just and honorable with love and care, as much as is possible. Then, perhaps, step away. To some, walking away or surrendering may seem like defeat, but it is not. Sometimes, it is the honorable thing to do.

We are called to love even those whom may not be so loving and kind to us. However, we are not called to bend to their will, to be under their thumb, or to dwell with them, possibly becoming like them. Hard as it may be, sometimes severing the ties and walking away, trusting that God will provide to those who are faithful to God, is the only way. While there may be temptation to see surrender as weakness, it depends on to whom the surrender is. When one surrenders, and clings, to God in such situations, there is freedom, peace, strength and courage.

“Basketball is not the ultimate. It is of small importance in comparison
to the total life we live. There is only one kind of life that truly wins,
and that is the one that places faith in the hands of the Savior. Until that
is done, we are on an aimless course that runs in circles and goes
nowhere.”   – John Wooden

“Good guys” do not always finish last. Keep the faith!

What Instrument Will I Be?

Throughout the past week, I found myself feeling so inspired by the words of Pope Francis during his visit to the United States of America. I continue to find, as many others do, his message and his manner so appealing. There is no duplicity in him, or at least it seems that way. He preaches, and from all evidence, lives a life of love and mercy and promotes peace and unity.

Pope Francis exudes the essence of one who is centered in prayer, has a desire to remain faithful to God, and is filled with and guided by the Holy Spirit. He is inclusive and calls us to look beyond ourselves to focus on the common good. He challenges us to be faithful to God and sets an example through his own actions. Not only that, but what makes his words and actions even more meaningful (at least to me), he does all of this, without making it about himself. All that he says and does seems to point to something greater…to God.

“Just so, your light must shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your heavenly Father.” – Matthew 5:16

What a great example! One that extends to more than just one group of people, one that is so life giving and aspires a closer relationship with God and others. Pope Francis calls us to be true to who God created us to be. To have a Pope named Francis, who comes to us in the name of God, through Jesus and with the Holy Spirit, at this time in history, how fitting!

Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy.

O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console,
To be understood as to understand,
To be loved as to love;
For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
It is in dying to self that we are born to eternal life.

– Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi

Rending My Heart…

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I recently had the opportunity to spend a few days in the mountains, and although I love the ocean, the sound of waves, the scenery and all that comes with being seaside, I always find the mountains so incredibly awe-inspiring. As I take in the beauty of creation, I find myself at peace, breathing easy and feeling such a sense of gratitude. Cares and concerns gradually melt away, as I journey to the top of the mountain. It is as if my heart is preparing to open wide, wider than seems possible, to receive the magnificence of God.

“Rend not your garments, rend your hearts.
Turn back your lives to me.” – Joel 2:13

While it is good for me to retreat to the mountains, the ocean, or other such places for the peace, healing and strengthening that only God can bring, I know that eventually, I must return. Sometimes I find it hard to come back down that mountain. It is so much easier, peaceful and distraction-free, to be in the world, when you are standing on what seems like the top of the world. Still though, I must go back. My work is elsewhere.

At a lower altitude, and reflecting on the peace and joy of being mountainside, I find myself feeling grateful first, and then sad at not being able to stay; then, led by the Spirit and through the grace of God, my attention shifts. I am not alone. I start to think of the people, places and things through which I experience the mountaintop within the busyness of everyday life. They are gifts from God. They are food for the journey, providing support and encouragement, and challenging me to remain hopeful, faithful, and fruitful. Praise God!

Led by the Spirit – by Bob Hurd

Led by the Spirit of our God,
we go to fast and pray
With Christ into the wilderness;
we join His paschal way.
“Rend not your garments, rend your hearts.
Turn back your lives to me.”
Thus says our kind and gracious God,
whose reign is liberty.

Led by the Spirit,
we confront temptation face to face,
And know full well we must
rely on God’s redeeming grace.
On bread alone we cannot live,
but nourished by the Word.
We seek the will of God to do:
this is our drink and food.

Led by the Spirit,
now draw near the waters of rebirth
With hearts that long to worship God
in spirit and in truth.
“Whoever drinks the drink
I give shall never thirst again.”
Thus says the Lord who died for us,
our Savior, kin and friend.

Led by the Spirit,
now sing praise to God the Trinity:
The Source of Life,
the living Word made flesh to set us free,
The Spirit blowing where it will
to make us friends of God:
This mystery far beyond our reach,
yet near in healing love.

I’m Listening (or at least trying)…

When God calls us, it is never in vain. No matter what God asks of us, it comes with a promise that we will not walk alone. God walks with us, strengthens us and enables us to answer the call as we go along. When we feel as if we are walking alone, it is often at our own hands. We have run ahead or stopped listening, leaving God behind. In those moments, we need to slow down and wait for God’s direction. It will come; eventually it always does.

Just this past week, I wrote the above statement. It is a belief that has formed and grown stronger over time and I have come to embrace it with all of my heart and soul. How can I be sure of it? How or when will God’s direction come? I cannot say. The answer is different for each person and each situation. Part of it is, and will remain, mystery. While I do not know all the details, I do know, and believe, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that the answer will come through prayer…answered prayer. Whether it is through my own prayer or that of others praying for me, or another, or a particular situation, God hears all those prayers and answers them in ways that are far greater than we could ever imagine and that are for the benefit of all involved, and beyond, even if we cannot see it. All we have to do is look at history, our own, and that of the world around us, to see God’s boundless mercy, love, compassion… the hand of God.

If there is one thing that experience has taught me, it is that when I place my hope and trust in God, any situation, no matter how “good” or “bad” it appears, can be a blessing. God’s faithfulness to God’s people (each, and every, person who humbly calls out to God, with a sincere, open heart) throughout history, despite our shortcomings, is truly amazing. Think about it.

In what ways has God blessed us throughout our lifetime? In what ways has God rescued us from the wilderness? What can we do with the gifts and blessings we have been granted?

Recently, I saw this quote, “All through nature, you will find the same law. First the need, then the means.” (Robert Collier, Author). While there may be a temptation to attribute “the means” (or the answer) to people of great knowledge, great wealth, or great luck, I cannot help but think of the Great Creator. That is, the One who not only loved us into existence, but who also grants us the time, the talent, and the heart to find a way to meet the need without becoming self-centered and self-serving.

What wondrous things occur when we cooperate with the grace of God! When we answer that call…respond to that nudge, or when we simply start the day, or whatever situation we find ourselves in, whether it is in waiting for direction or moving into action, with, “Here I am, Lord. Help me to desire that which You desire. Let Thy will be done through me.”

The Summons (lyrics by John L. Bell & Graham Maule)

Will you come and follow me if I but call your name?
Will you go where you don’t know and never be the same?
Will you let my love be shown? Will you let my name be known,
will you let my life be grown in you and you in me?

Will you leave yourself behind if I but call your name?
Will you care for cruel and kind and never be the same?
Will you risk the hostile stare should your life attract or scare?
Will you let me answer prayer in you and you in me?

Will you let the blinded see if I but call your name?
Will you set the prisoners free and never be the same?
Will you kiss the leper clean and do such as this unseen,
and admit to what I mean in you and you in me?

Will you love the “you” you hide if I but call your name?
Will you quell the fear inside and never be the same?
Will you use the faith you’ve found to reshape the world around,
Through my sight and touch and sound in you and you in me?

Lord your summons echoes true when you but call my name.
Let me turn and follow you and never be the same.
In Your company I’ll go where Your love and footsteps show.
Thus I’ll move and live and grow in you and you in me.    

There Will Be An Answer…

“There will be an answer. Let it be.” – Paul McCartney

Trust that there will be an answer. Wait for it. That can be so hard at times, especially living in a “right here, right now” world. A fast paced, blink and you will miss it, world.

There are so many sayings about time…time is of the essence…once you lose time you cannot get it back…time waits for nobody…so little time, so much to do, and so on. What, then, is essential for me to do with my time? Perhaps it is choosing wisely how to spend it…something that, yes, takes time.

“For thus said the Lord GOD,
the Holy One of Israel:
By waiting and by calm you shall be saved,
in quiet and in trust shall be your strength.
But this you did not will.” – Isaiah 30:15

What makes it so difficult, at times, for me not only to wait, but also to trust that, as I wait, an answer is on its way? Not only does Scripture tell me to wait for the Lord, trusting in divine providence and grace:

“Truly, the LORD is waiting to be gracious to you,
truly, he shall rise to show you mercy;
For the LORD is a God of justice:
happy are all who wait for him!” – Isaiah 30:18

“And your ears shall hear a word behind you:
“This is the way; walk in it,”
when you would turn to the right or the left.” – Isaiah 30:21

but when I take the time to reflect, so does my life experience. So often, taking the time to slow down, to continue to pray and to discern, and to wait for God instead of jumping into the fast lane and forging ahead as the world would have me, has lead me to a better answer…a better decision, than I could have devised solely, on my own. By allowing time, that precious time, and waiting, I have often been granted an answer… a nudge…a tweak to my original course of action or plan that has made a difference for the better and made waiting not only worthwhile, but also a gift…a blessing.

When I am feeling impatient and pressured by the ticking of the clock, I need to call myself back to the truth. I need to remember how good God has been to me. To remain faithful and trust that God will continue to be good to me, and perhaps most importantly, I need to cherish the time I spend waiting. I need to toss aside the clock and trust in God’s time.

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Ring A New Song…

A number of years ago, I saw an announcement looking for bell ringers for a hand bell choir that was starting up at my church. I remember being interested, but also being mindful of the fact that despite my love for listening to music, I did not know the slightest thing about reading music.

As I was contemplating whether I should contact the music director, I thought of my younger brother, Douglas, who had passed away a month earlier. August would be approaching soon and he would have been turning 38. He was such a kid at heart and always had a “can do” attitude and a sense of excitement, enthusiasm and optimism about him. Some, even I at times, thought him to be naïve, but in hindsight, I now know that he was anything but naïve. He was living life to the fullest, and what a blessing, especially because in 37 years, one could say that Douglas lived a full life.

As I sat there, bell choir announcement in hand, I could picture his beautiful face with that mischievous grin and sense his gentle, loving soul nudging me to ignore the voice that was saying, “You don’t even know how to read music!” Nudging me to try something totally new; not to sing a new song, but to ring a new song.

That night I sent a message to the music director introducing myself and explaining my interest and that I could not read music at all. I was pleasantly surprised when her response indicated that despite my music reading ability (or inability in this case) I was welcome; she could teach me what I needed to know. With that, I decided to give it a try, and what a blessing it has been.

In the time I have been in the bell choir, not only have I learned to read music with the help of a music director who is probably one of the most patient, encouraging, and optimistic people I know, but I have also become part of a supportive, nurturing, lively and fun group of bell ringers. I could have never imagined what a gift being in the bell choir was going to be when I first started. In fact, I got off to a bumpy start. I felt completely inept in the beginning. It did not come easy to me at all and that was hard for me to accept; I had never really stuck with anything that I was not particularly good at before this experience. Looking back, I feel so grateful for the patience and encouragement of the music director as well as for being part of a group that was, and continues to be, pretty much easy going as we all learned to ring better and work together.

All of that seems so long ago now. When I think about it though, I am so glad that I gave the thing that initially seemed ridiculous to even try, a chance…a ring. Whether at rehearsal or during Mass I find it so uplifting now; it puts a hop in my step and joy in my heart.  Who would have ever thought I would find ringing bells so peaceful and calming, and so life giving? I certainly did not…but my brother did!

Thank you Douglas, for teaching your older sister (I know, barely that much older) a new song. Every time we ring a piece that has a mallet section, I use the mallets as if they are drumsticks and imagine you and me, again, as children, playing the drums together.

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