Being in the world

Finding a Rhythm…

When our children were young, one of the books my husband and I used to read to them was Zin! Zin! Zin! A Violin! by Lloyd Moss with illustrations by Marjorie Priceman. The storyline introduced, with a flair that was intriguing, ten instruments that make up a chamber group. The words and illustrations used to describe each instrument with its different look, sound, and feel, awakened the imagination and the senses. By the end, one could easily envision being in the audience, attending the performance.

Each instrument is capable of creating sound on its own; acceptable maybe even wonderful, but one-dimensional. When together, embraced and celebrated along with the others, different as they may look, sound and feel they are so much more. They are enhanced not only by the existence of the others, but also by the cooperation and co-laboring with them. The brass, string, and woodwind instruments are all necessary parts to create the movement, the music…the melody and harmony of the chamber group.

While there is a conductor “running the show,” he or she is not the one who brought the group of musicians together. It was love of music that brought the entire group, conductor included, together. It all started with Love…it all started with a Word.

It is what binds the group together and propels them forward. It is what enables them to sit side-by-side, working together with respect, courtesy, and dignity, listening to each other, adjusting to each other, and allowing each other to play their individual instruments together, making music instead of cacophony…Taking all that came before and making a bridge from the past to the present as they move toward the future…Taking all that they have learned and experienced, making room for the new and/or different that each has to offer, becoming stronger, better, and richer in sound, and in character.

Any one musician can use his or her instrument to make noise, but for the chamber group to make music everyone in the group needs to be in sync with each other. Everyone in the group needs to be guided more by their love of music than their love of their particular instrument.

“In the beginning was the Word,
and the Word was with God,
and the Word was God.”
– John 1:1

Not All Flowers Are Red…That’s Intentional

Flowers Are Red by Harry Chapin

The little boy went first day of school
He got some crayons and he started to draw
He put colors all over the paper
For colors was what he saw

And the teacher said, “What you doin’ young man?”
“I’m paintin’ flowers” he said
She said, “It’s not the time for art young man
And anyway flowers are green and red”

“There’s a time for everything young man
And a way it should be done
You’ve got to show concern for everyone else
For you’re not the only one”

And she said, “Flowers are red young man
And green leaves are green
There’s no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen”

But the little boy said
“There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one”

Well the teacher said, “You’re sassy
There’s ways that things should be
And you’ll paint flowers the way they are
So repeat after me”

And she said, “Flowers are red, young man
And green leaves are green
There’s no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen”

But the little boy said
“There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one”

The teacher put him in a corner
She said, “It’s for your own good
And you won’t come out ’til you get it right
And are responding like you should”

Well finally he got lonely
Frightened thoughts filled his head
And he went up to the teacher
And this is what he said

And he said
“Flowers are red, and green leaves are green
There’s no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen”

Time went by like it always does
And they moved to another town
And the little boy went to another school
And this is what he found

The teacher there was smilin’
She said, “Painting should be fun
And there are so many colors in a flower
So let’s use every one”

But that little boy painted flowers
In neat rows of green and red
And when the teacher asked him why
This is what he said

And he said
“Flowers are red, and green leaves are green
There’s no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen”

The longer I live, the more I see that fewer and fewer things are black and white, and that when I am truly focused on, and acting out of love, whatever the situation may be, color, shape or form have very little bearing at all.

Imagine what it might be like to be in a world, where encouragement toward discovering and using one’s God-given gifts was the norm, and where love was the driving force of each word and each action. If society let God be God…If religion, instead of being used at times and/or seen by some as a tool for “fixing” each other, so we can all be the “same,” focused more heavily on love and relationship…relationship with God and with each other. What might it be like, if the need to be “right” were dismissed?

Somehow, I cannot help but think and feel that if God wanted everyone to be, to think, and to feel the exact same, God would have made that happen. God didn’t though. However, God did inscribe the same law, the law of love, on all of our hearts. God also inspired Scripture that is full of examples of love, mercy, and compassion across all kinds of situations and “would be” societal barriers.

While it may seem hard to live in and out of love, day in and day out, it is not impossible. All we have to do is try…and keep on trying. God will make it happen…if we ask (and keep on asking), and then let go and let God be in charge.

“The important thing is not to think much but to love much; and so do that which best stirs you to love.” ― St. Teresa of Ávila

First Or Last, What Difference Does It Make?

At times, it can be hard to accept the instances in which the “good guy” finishes last. When I have played by the golden rules and held myself to moral and ethical standards, only to be stomped on, passed over, or finishing last to one who has not. In moments like that, it can be very tempting to let go of the higher road, to seek revenge and/or to set out to play, from now on, by the very rules that go against my grain.

While I could shift to a lower gear, possibly squash anyone along the path and “win” the next situation, I have to stop and ask myself, at what cost would I be doing so? When I ask myself, “Is it really worth it to me to become something other than my true self in order to ‘win?’ ” without fail, I find that it is not. The end does not justify the means; at least not for me.

Sometimes I wonder, what does winning even really mean? To some, it seems to mean having or achieving more than others do and being the king or queen of the jungle, even if it requires words and actions that are ruthless and that cut down others. To some, it seems to mean striving to live life well, to be compassionate and loving, to be honest and to have integrity with oneself and others.

“We don’t have to be superstars or win championships….
All we have to do is learn to rise to every occasion, give our best effort,
and make those around us better as we do it.” — John Wooden

Although there is an “i” (actually two of them) in the word winning, when “I” is at the center of the way in which one operates, chances are that those around that person are not being made better. Instead, they are being driven away or encouraged in ways that are self-serving and that pave the way toward the decay of genuine character.

So what am I to do when the unjust occurs? If it is within me, and the words and actions arise into consciousness, stand up and speak up for what is just and honorable with love and care, as much as is possible. Then, perhaps, step away. To some, walking away or surrendering may seem like defeat, but it is not. Sometimes, it is the honorable thing to do.

We are called to love even those whom may not be so loving and kind to us. However, we are not called to bend to their will, to be under their thumb, or to dwell with them, possibly becoming like them. Hard as it may be, sometimes severing the ties and walking away, trusting that God will provide to those who are faithful to God, is the only way. While there may be temptation to see surrender as weakness, it depends on to whom the surrender is. When one surrenders, and clings, to God in such situations, there is freedom, peace, strength and courage.

“Basketball is not the ultimate. It is of small importance in comparison
to the total life we live. There is only one kind of life that truly wins,
and that is the one that places faith in the hands of the Savior. Until that
is done, we are on an aimless course that runs in circles and goes
nowhere.”   – John Wooden

“Good guys” do not always finish last. Keep the faith!

What Instrument Will I Be?

Throughout the past week, I found myself feeling so inspired by the words of Pope Francis during his visit to the United States of America. I continue to find, as many others do, his message and his manner so appealing. There is no duplicity in him, or at least it seems that way. He preaches, and from all evidence, lives a life of love and mercy and promotes peace and unity.

Pope Francis exudes the essence of one who is centered in prayer, has a desire to remain faithful to God, and is filled with and guided by the Holy Spirit. He is inclusive and calls us to look beyond ourselves to focus on the common good. He challenges us to be faithful to God and sets an example through his own actions. Not only that, but what makes his words and actions even more meaningful (at least to me), he does all of this, without making it about himself. All that he says and does seems to point to something greater…to God.

“Just so, your light must shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your heavenly Father.” – Matthew 5:16

What a great example! One that extends to more than just one group of people, one that is so life giving and aspires a closer relationship with God and others. Pope Francis calls us to be true to who God created us to be. To have a Pope named Francis, who comes to us in the name of God, through Jesus and with the Holy Spirit, at this time in history, how fitting!

Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy.

O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console,
To be understood as to understand,
To be loved as to love;
For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
It is in dying to self that we are born to eternal life.

– Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi

The Bottom Line…

“It’s the action, not the fruit of the action, that’s important.
You have to do the right thing. It may not be in your power,
may not be in your time, that there’ll be any fruit. But that
doesn’t mean you stop doing the right thing. You may never
know what results come from your action. But if you do nothing,
there will be no result.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

In what seems like a win-at-all-costs society and in situations where it seems like the odds of existing, and being part of, with authenticity and integrity are slim to none, it can be hard to know what to do. It can also be very tempting to throw my hands up, pull back or walk away and fall prey to a “why bother?” attitude and to think, “what difference does it make?”

As I sit with the question, “When is it okay for me to walk away?” and pray about a particular situation, I think of a quote I saw recently, “I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do.” (Edward Everett Hale, American politician). As I think about this quote, I take a turn and my prayer moves to the questions, “Is there anything I can do? What can I do before deciding whether or not to walk away?”

I can speak up, sharing with those involved and privy to the situation what is in my heart and on my mind with love, care and concern, regardless of what may or may not come of it. My words may not make a difference in a way that I can see now, in a way that I might ever see, or at all. If I speak up though, and what I say is rooted in prayer and consistent with the words and example of the Divine, I give voice to the Truth that has arisen from within me. Then, if I do end up walking away, at least I can do so with a greater sense of freedom and no regrets. I can be at peace knowing that I saw something, it did not hold up when I held it up to the Light, and at a time and in a way in which I felt called to do so, I shared my concerns and spoke my piece regarding it.

So what is left? If I am looking toward what I can do, I can continue to pray for a positive and life-giving resolution, whatever that may be. I can also continue to ask God for the grace to trust that I did what I felt called to do and that God will do what is best, and when it is best, for all involved. In addition, I can continue to wait to make a decision about walking away. God helped me to know when to speak and what to say. “Certainly,” I tell myself, “God will help me to know when it is time to walk away.” My job for now is to wait and listen.

“The seed is the word of God.” – Luke 8:11

The seed is given to me (to us) through Scripture, prayer and revelation. It is a gift from God. What am I to do with it? First, and foremost, listen to it (be still and be aware)…embrace it with a heart of love (be open to it)…persevere in it and through it (be faithful, be patient and trust). These are all things that I can do. When I do them, what to do, eventually, becomes clear.

Rending My Heart…

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I recently had the opportunity to spend a few days in the mountains, and although I love the ocean, the sound of waves, the scenery and all that comes with being seaside, I always find the mountains so incredibly awe-inspiring. As I take in the beauty of creation, I find myself at peace, breathing easy and feeling such a sense of gratitude. Cares and concerns gradually melt away, as I journey to the top of the mountain. It is as if my heart is preparing to open wide, wider than seems possible, to receive the magnificence of God.

“Rend not your garments, rend your hearts.
Turn back your lives to me.” – Joel 2:13

While it is good for me to retreat to the mountains, the ocean, or other such places for the peace, healing and strengthening that only God can bring, I know that eventually, I must return. Sometimes I find it hard to come back down that mountain. It is so much easier, peaceful and distraction-free, to be in the world, when you are standing on what seems like the top of the world. Still though, I must go back. My work is elsewhere.

At a lower altitude, and reflecting on the peace and joy of being mountainside, I find myself feeling grateful first, and then sad at not being able to stay; then, led by the Spirit and through the grace of God, my attention shifts. I am not alone. I start to think of the people, places and things through which I experience the mountaintop within the busyness of everyday life. They are gifts from God. They are food for the journey, providing support and encouragement, and challenging me to remain hopeful, faithful, and fruitful. Praise God!

Led by the Spirit – by Bob Hurd

Led by the Spirit of our God,
we go to fast and pray
With Christ into the wilderness;
we join His paschal way.
“Rend not your garments, rend your hearts.
Turn back your lives to me.”
Thus says our kind and gracious God,
whose reign is liberty.

Led by the Spirit,
we confront temptation face to face,
And know full well we must
rely on God’s redeeming grace.
On bread alone we cannot live,
but nourished by the Word.
We seek the will of God to do:
this is our drink and food.

Led by the Spirit,
now draw near the waters of rebirth
With hearts that long to worship God
in spirit and in truth.
“Whoever drinks the drink
I give shall never thirst again.”
Thus says the Lord who died for us,
our Savior, kin and friend.

Led by the Spirit,
now sing praise to God the Trinity:
The Source of Life,
the living Word made flesh to set us free,
The Spirit blowing where it will
to make us friends of God:
This mystery far beyond our reach,
yet near in healing love.

What is Love?

My faith tells me that God is Love, but what does it really mean to me, in this world, to be loved and what does a relationship that embodies love look like? Is it one in which whatever I do and say is okay and praised by the other? One that is free from struggle, obstacles or disagreement along the way? “No,” and “No,” I do not believe so.

In looking around and considering society and relationships, sometimes “unconditional love” is twisted to justify words and actions that are self-serving and self-centered. Sometimes it is used to justify silence and inaction in the face of injustice or wrongdoing. Unconditional love does not mean saying “Yes” all the time. Although it is boundless or unrestricted, it calls us to say and to hear “No,” at times when we do not want to as well as to say and hear “Yes,” at times when we would rather not. Either way, it calls me to recognize that there is a time and a place for me, for us, and others, to be challenged…to be called to peel back the layers and look more closely at the root or the source that is driving us and motivating us.

On the surface, unconditional love may be mistaken for blanket approval. However, the road that is paved both on the surface and with nothing but approval and praise at every turn is called deceit. It leads to sinkholes, degrades the conscience, encourages indifference and ultimately, leads to defeat.

To the contrary, unconditional love does not need to be covered up. Where it exists, pretending, hiding or the stifling of thoughts and feelings, cannot. That is because its very nature calls for acceptance, honesty, and forthrightness; not exclusive of each other, but altogether and intertwined with each other.

So how can one know or sense the presence of unconditional love? For starters, where unconditional love exists, there is freedom…freedom to be oneself, but never at the expense of others and always alongside them. Another telltale sign, true love is never in a vacuum. It extends beyond oneself and beyond the relationship. Finally, and most importantly, unconditional love is always through the grace of God. Pray for it and you will receive it. Cherish it and it will flow through you.

“…Love from a pure heart, a good conscience, and a sincere faith.” – 1 Timothy 1:5  

Do You Hear What I Hear?

“In the end, a life of prayer is a life with open hands—a life where we are not ashamed of our weaknesses but realize that it is more perfect for us to be led by the Other than to try to hold everything in our own hands.” – Henri Nouwen

Sometimes it can be hard to let go of what I want, or what I deem as necessary. It’s funny though, when I do let go, I almost always end up getting what I really needed, but didn’t know I needed it, until I got it.

I cannot help but wonder, what causes me to have tunnel vision at times? What is it that causes me to be trapped in a line of thinking? Invariably, it comes down to judgments…judgments based on MY perspective.

What is it that prevents me from looking beyond my perspective, at times, causing me to put myself in a box, limiting myself, and others? A broad perspective makes a world of difference. Perhaps that is why time heals all wounds. When I can take a step back and look from more than one angle it is often to the benefit of all involved.

Perspective! It is interesting how two people can hear (or see), the same thing but notice or perceive it in ways that are very different. We all have our own perspectives, but so often, it seems the tendency is to name one as being right and dismiss the other as being wrong. I wonder what causes this and how much is overlooked or missed in this process.

What would happen if the process was slowed down? If judgment was suspended and a closer look was given to that which is so readily dismissed? Could we…would we, find some value in it?

What kind of difference might doing so make? Could there be learning and growth waiting for all parties involved? What would happen if the focus shifted away from the judgment of right and wrong, or any other kind of labeling, until after previous notions and ideas are let go, and honest consideration is given across the board?

How might things be different if the starting place was more consistently one of seeing each other as being created in the image of God, and trying to receive and respond to each other with openness in our hearts and a genuine desire to try to see or hear from each other’s perspective? Not only trying to put ourselves in each other’s shoes, but actually letting the other person help us to do so. That is, instead of judging or tossing aside the other’s point of view, or assuming we know what it is like, saying, “Tell me more,” “What do you mean?” or “Help me to understand your experience of this situation?”

I wonder, how often, when people or things are tossed aside and deemed “unworthy” are we unknowingly, saying “No” to the Spirit of God within another…or within ourselves?

There Will Be An Answer…

“There will be an answer. Let it be.” – Paul McCartney

Trust that there will be an answer. Wait for it. That can be so hard at times, especially living in a “right here, right now” world. A fast paced, blink and you will miss it, world.

There are so many sayings about time…time is of the essence…once you lose time you cannot get it back…time waits for nobody…so little time, so much to do, and so on. What, then, is essential for me to do with my time? Perhaps it is choosing wisely how to spend it…something that, yes, takes time.

“For thus said the Lord GOD,
the Holy One of Israel:
By waiting and by calm you shall be saved,
in quiet and in trust shall be your strength.
But this you did not will.” – Isaiah 30:15

What makes it so difficult, at times, for me not only to wait, but also to trust that, as I wait, an answer is on its way? Not only does Scripture tell me to wait for the Lord, trusting in divine providence and grace:

“Truly, the LORD is waiting to be gracious to you,
truly, he shall rise to show you mercy;
For the LORD is a God of justice:
happy are all who wait for him!” – Isaiah 30:18

“And your ears shall hear a word behind you:
“This is the way; walk in it,”
when you would turn to the right or the left.” – Isaiah 30:21

but when I take the time to reflect, so does my life experience. So often, taking the time to slow down, to continue to pray and to discern, and to wait for God instead of jumping into the fast lane and forging ahead as the world would have me, has lead me to a better answer…a better decision, than I could have devised solely, on my own. By allowing time, that precious time, and waiting, I have often been granted an answer… a nudge…a tweak to my original course of action or plan that has made a difference for the better and made waiting not only worthwhile, but also a gift…a blessing.

When I am feeling impatient and pressured by the ticking of the clock, I need to call myself back to the truth. I need to remember how good God has been to me. To remain faithful and trust that God will continue to be good to me, and perhaps most importantly, I need to cherish the time I spend waiting. I need to toss aside the clock and trust in God’s time.

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Who Am I?

“To be nobody but myself–in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make me somebody else–means to fight the hardest battle any human can fight, and never stop fighting.” – e.e. cummings

As I look around, so often it seems like what I do matters more than, “who I am.”

I am, first, and foremost, a child of God. Then, a daughter, wife, mother, aunt, friend and neighbor, and the list goes on. There was a time when my list would have started with my job title and then worked its way back with “child of God” being somewhere further back on the list, maybe even last. While in lots of ways, I was a success, having all the “necessities” of life and more, I was not happy. I did not have a happiness (or joy) that permeated my being…only a surface happiness. I recall thinking, at times, “There has to be more to life than this. This can’t be all there is.”

There was something missing. Come to find out, God was missing. No, actually, God was not missing. God was there, but I was not inviting God into my daily life. Despite attending Sunday Mass, I had no relationship with God, or at least not one that had any depth to it. I find it interesting that as I have worked to deepen my relationship with God, I have not only come to learn more about God, but have also come to see, more and more, who I am at the core of my being. In addition, I have come to see the gifts God has given to me as well as to consider how God might be calling me to use them in a way that is beneficial for me, and the people, and the world, around me. In chapter 1, verse 27, in the Book of Genesis, the Bible states:

“God created mankind in his image;
in the image of God he created them;
male and female he created them.”

What does it mean to me to be created in the likeness of God? While this may seem like a simple question, it cannot be answered without digging a little deeper. I need to have some idea of the following: What do I believe about God? How have I experienced God? Who has God been to me? and who is God to me now?

In my own life, I have found that putting my relationship with God at the center of my life…staying connected…listening and speaking with God and spending time with God’s Word, which has led to taking in, with new eyes and ears, the beauty of all of creation, has been the key to experiencing true happiness in life. That is, a sense of peace and well-being, that no amount of money or earthly people or things could give. This is not to say that everything goes my way all the time, but as “being a child of God” has moved forward on my list of who I am, whether things go my way or not is becoming less relevant.

St. Paul says, “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if one has a grievance against another; as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do. And over all these put on love, that is, the bond of perfection. And let the peace of Christ control your hearts, the peace into which you were also called in one body. And be thankful.” (Col 3:12-15)

When I am able to hold fast to these truths, having only goodwill in my heart, nothing can harm me or take away who I am…who God created me to be, and…I am truly happy. There is no better feeling than that of joy in the Lord. Praise God!

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But Moses said to God, “Who am I…” – Exodus 3:11