Relationship

To Love and Be Loved…

As Valentine’s Day approaches, flowers, chocolates, cards and other gifts that have come to be seen as expressions of affection and love abound. There are so many ways to express one’s love for another, especially materially. However, ultimately, love is much deeper than that which can be smelled, eaten or touched. It is about what we do and in how we respond to one another.

Genuine love is priceless and often reaches farther than one might realize. It comes with meaning and depth that includes freedom to be one self, trust, truth and acceptance toward another or at the hands of another. Genuine love is not a one-way street. It flows to and from, and then over and beyond.

“To be loved, to be loved (to be loved)/ Oh what a feeling/ To be loved,” Jackie Wilson sings in the song written by Roquel Davis, Gwendolyn Gordy Fuqua, and Berry Gordy Jr. The song continues, “Some wish to be a king or a queen/ Some wish for fortune and fame/ But to be truly, truly, truly loved/ Is more than all of these things.”

There is no power greater than love. In fact, all creation springs forth from Love. In God’s love we enter this world with the capacity to both love and be loved. This genuine love is the bond that holds humanity together.

What is it then, that gets in the way? What is it that prevents love, the kind that shines bright and true, from being realized or lived out? In what ways do I contribute to, or detract from, the flow of God’s love within, around and beyond me?

While at a quick glance, money and power seem most likely culprits, at the heart of the matter, love is most often trampled upon by self-interest that exceeds or excludes care and concern for others; a primary focus on gathering, preserving, receiving or taking for oneself. When vision becomes narrow and self-centered, the ability to love and to be loved also narrows; becoming inhibited or incapacitated.

When this happens though, hope need not be lost. With real love, there is no such thing as a “point of no return.” Perhaps one of the greatest characteristics of authentic love is that its source is ever-present. Genuine love is always within reach, waiting for that moment of turning around to show us the way…softening the heart…embracing and lifting us up in communion once more.

To be loved is a blessing…to love…a gift.

goldenheart

 

The Call of Compassion…

The voice of compassion calls us to reach out and minister to one another. After all, the origin of the word “compassion” is the Latin word “compati” which means, “to suffer with.” With the recent spread of a stomach flu that is going around the school system in my town, the word “compassion” instantly conjures a vision of parents caring for their children.

Renowned spiritual writer Henri Nouwen wrote, “Compassion asks us to go where it hurts, to enter into the places of pain, to share in brokenness, fear, confusion, and anguish. Compassion challenges us to cry out with those in misery, to mourn with those who are lonely, to weep with those in tears. Compassion requires us to be weak with the weak, vulnerable with the vulnerable, and powerless with the powerless. Compassion means full immersion in the condition of being human.”

As I go about my life, it is good for me to be aware of, and to explore, the instances where I might feel uncomfortable or resistant to compassion as I interact with others. No matter the relationship, it is important to notice the places where compassion may be lacking; where my heart may be hardened. Do I recognize and accept these as possible invitations to growth and new life, or do I avoid them?

Often when I heed the call to compassion, it leads to a place of discovery, re-discovery, and ultimately, joy. Compassion often holds the key to both joy and peace. It calls me to look beyond myself. It is rather interesting that in looking outward, I can see more clearly inward. With compassion, there is healing in both directions.

It does not end there though. Compassion, like so much through which grace shines, is multi-faceted. On the one hand, it has us reaching out to others, but on the other, it has us coming back to also show care for ourselves. One cannot give what one does not have.

Sometimes compassion and sacrifice go hand in hand, challenging us to open and lend our hearts all the time, and in many different places. Even those times and places that may not be convenient or preferred. However, compassion does not always require sacrifice. There are times when the greatest expression of compassion is simply being present…lending one’s ear…offering a caring smile.

In ministry and in service to one another…in being present, moving a little closer, and listening attentively, we both embrace and, at the same time, exude compassion.

purpleflowerck

excerptsfromsdipost

Waiting for dawn…

Each day, the sun rises in the east and works its way across the sky, eventually setting in the west, making way for evening. As night approaches, the moon and stars appear to light the way. Regardless of the clouds or fog…regardless of what else may be happening, this process is perpetual. One can count on it, not only based upon what we have been told and all that is written, but also based upon personal experience. It is the way it is and there is a certain rhythm to each day because of it.

It can be intriguing to consider the earth and all that is in and around it. The way it all came to be and how it works is Genius. It is also interesting to think about how our human understanding has changed throughout time as exploration has led to discovery and things that were once mystery or unknown have, over time, been revealed.

John the Baptist saw Jesus coming toward him and said,
“Behold, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world.
He is the one of whom I said,
‘A man is coming after me who ranks ahead of me
because he existed before me.’
I did not know him,
but the reason why I came baptizing with water
was that he might be made known to Israel.”
John testified further, saying,
“I saw the Spirit come down like a dove from heaven
and remain upon him.
I did not know him,
but the one who sent me to baptize with water told me,
‘On whomever you see the Spirit come down and remain,
he is the one who will baptize with the Holy Spirit.’
Now I have seen and testified that he is the Son of God.” – John 1:29-34

John the Baptist says two times, “I did not know him,” referring to Jesus. However, through both what he had been told and what he had experienced, he came to know Him. As John went about his way, fulfilling his purpose and carrying out his life’s work, the way, the truth and the life was revealed to him.

Just as the sky reveals the sun and moon, helping us to know night from day, so too does God reveal knowledge and wisdom through both darkness and light in our everyday life. John the Baptist was told by God not only his purpose, but also how to recognize the One for whom he was preparing the way. Like the sun and the moon, regardless of the clouds or fog, God is always there, faithful and steadfast, providing insight and showing us which way to go.

God waited, and waited for me,
and when I looked up and listened,
God gave me roots to stand firm,
and wings to fly free,
but most of all, God’s love gave me
gratitude on my lips,
hope in my heart,
and a desire to truly live.

waitintfordawn2

Life’s gifts…

nativity2

The magi saw the star at its rising. They followed it and when they arrived at the place where it stopped, they honored the newborn King. They payed homage and offered not only their gifts, but also their hearts. Then, having seen and been received by “the child with Mary his mother” (Mt 2:11), the newborn King to whom they were led, they went home another way. Surely it would have been easier for them to go home the way they had come to Bethlehem, but a dream warning them not to return to Herod told them different. They received it, much the same way that they received the star at its rising; with a deep desire to go where it led. They, like the shepherds, knew which authority was worth following and it led them to Life.

Kahlil Gibran wrote, “Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself” (The Prophet). Similarly each journey one might embark upon or each endeavor one may seek to carry out brings with it “Life’s longing for itself.” No journey or endeavor is mine alone. No, rather each is part of a much bigger picture. However, if they become mine alone then “Life’s longing for itself,” and the joy that accompanies it, will fade away.

If the magi had stopped their journey when they reached King Herod and found no newborn king at the place where they had expected to find him, if they had not continued following the star, or if they had ignored the dream and returned home from Bethlehem the easier way…the same route, life would have been unchanged.

God is with us, it is up to us if we want to be with God. When we do, there is Life.

When Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea,
in the days of King Herod,
behold, magi from the east arrived in Jerusalem, saying,
“Where is the newborn king of the Jews?
We saw his star at its rising and
have come to do him homage.”
When King Herod heard this,
he was greatly troubled,
and all Jerusalem with him.
Assembling all the chief priests and the scribes of the people,
He inquired of them where the Christ was to be born.
They said to him, “In Bethlehem of Judea,
for thus it has been written through the prophet:

And you, Bethlehem, land of Judah,
are by no means least among the rulers of Judah;
since from you shall come a ruler,
who is to shepherd my people Israel.”

Then Herod called the magi secretly
and ascertained from them the time of the star’s appearance.
He sent them to Bethlehem and said,
“Go and search diligently for the child.
When you have found him, bring me word,
that I too may go and do him homage.”
After their audience with the king they set out.
And behold, the star that they had seen at its rising preceded them,
until it came and stopped over the place where the child was.
They were overjoyed at seeing the star,
and on entering the house
they saw the child with Mary his mother.
They prostrated themselves and did him homage.
Then they opened their treasures
and offered him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh.
And having been warned in a dream not to return to Herod,
they departed for their country by another way.
– Matthew 2:1-12

The Little Things…

I received a message the other day from a loved one that ended with the words, “It’s the little things.” Immediately I smiled as I thought, “Yes, indeed it is.” So much in society seems to shout, “Go big. Go bold!” Yet, so often, it is in the little things, or stemming from them, that big things occur.

Joseph had, “decided to divorce her (Mary) quietly” (Matthew 1:19). Quietly, the truth was revealed to Joseph in a dream through an angel sent by God. Just as, quietly, in “a light silent sound” the Lord spoke to the Prophet Elijah (1 Kings 19:11-12). The Lord spoke in the silence not in the strong and violent wind or the earthquake, although those certainly caught Elijah’s attention.

Sometimes life can get so busy and the voice of God can seem far away or even absent. Yet God is ever-present, even in the strong and violent wind, in the earthquake, and in the big, bold world in which we live. God is always with us, but we may not always be with, or be aware of, and tuned into God.

Sometimes, the best thing one can do is to take a little time. At times, we all need to pause…to step into the silence…to look around and listen a little more closely.

“What you seek is seeking you.” – Rumi

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In a Word, at First Sight…

“God is watching out for me.” I saw this sentence earlier in the week and was struck by the way one word can make such a difference. There is something that seems so much more comforting about the idea of God “watching out for me” as compared to God “watching over me.” It is interesting how one word can transform a sentence and create an image that seems easier to embrace. God is not a hovering, “big brother” kind of presence, but rather with me. God is leading the way and protecting me.

Oftentimes it can be all too easy to turn away from something or be closed off to it because of the way it is presented. It can be interesting though, to rewind and replay, taking the time to explore whatever it is that seems offensive in some way. Not only revisiting it, but perhaps also replacing it with what fits or rings true for me.

For example, years ago, I was speaking with a cousin about a new computer she had received. In the conversation, she said something about it not being new, as someone had previously owned it. I think I just said, “Oh,” not knowing what else to say. There was a brief pause and then she said, “Well, it is new to me.”

Sometimes we can be caught up in semantics or, without even realizing it; we can look at things in black and white…with rigidity. When we do this, we are shutting out things that could be helpful in some way and we may be limiting potential growth and learning. This can be especially true when it comes to faith, whatever one’s faith or religion may be.

Yes, there are certain beliefs…practices…tenets to guide the faithful. However, none of them covers every possible situation that I may face. If I do not have some sort of understanding on a deeper, more personal level… an understanding in a way that I can relate to in addition to those beliefs, practices and tenets, then my faith is likely to become stagnant rather than a faith that is living and growing. This is something that is up to me though. I can choose to ignore or reject the things in the world that are different, upset or irritate me, or make no sense to me, or I can choose to look more closely, ask questions, pray, and to seek some sort of value in, or insight by way of them.

Just as, “every cloud has a silver lining,” everything that we may see, at first sight, as nonsensical, annoying, or as oppositional and to be resisted (including defeat), likely comes as a gift, or holds one within it. The question is, “Am I open to unwrapping, and receiving it?”

“We have an infinite amount to learn
both from nature and from each other.”
– John Glenn

earthblue-marble_nasa-earth-observatory

A Voice for all Seasons…

In the middle of a season where there is an extraordinary amount of “crying out” in the form of advertisements, promotions and appeals, it can be easy to get caught up in the busyness that often accompanies this time of year and for the voice within and the peace that comes with it to become muzzled or even disconnected. At a time of the year when many observe the season of Advent, a period of waiting, watching and preparing, Scripture cries out through the readings in the book of the Prophet Isaiah and through the words of John the Baptist in Gospel passages.

John the Baptist was “a voice of one crying out in the desert.” Each of us is also a voice of one…in our families, among our friends, and out and about in the world. Regardless of whether or not we share certain beliefs and practices, we all have a voice that is unique, and all of us have been given the gifts to use that voice through both words and actions. How do I use that voice? For what is my soul crying out?

John the Baptist had a strong sense of his mission to prepare the way for the Lord. That very same sense of purpose and direction from God is available to each of us. How often do I take the time to seek it?

John is also very clear about his role. He states, “I am baptizing you with water, for repentance, but the one who is coming after me is mightier than I. I am not worthy to carry his sandals. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire.”

Oftentimes we can feel as though we are not worthy or up to the task in front of us. Yet there are many examples that we can point to, both in Scripture and through our life experiences, of God working through those who “are not worthy” or who feel they are not capable. John the Baptist states that he is not worthy, yet he was chosen to prepare the way for the Lord…he baptized the Lord. He is likely trying to make it clear that he is not the Messiah or on equal par with the Savior who is to come. His sense of purpose and his role is ingrained in him along with a vision that extends beyond himself. He is a child of God, doing the work for which God has chosen him, he is worthy and capable, as are we.

Take some time to think of people who have prepared the way for you. Just as God has placed those people in your life, God has also placed you in their life as well as in the life of others. What is it like to envision yourself in the line of those who prepare the way for others? What feelings and desires arise within you as you stay with this image?

Now take a few moments to think of or picture John, “a voice of one crying out in the desert.” He says, “Prepare the way of the Lord, make straight his paths: all flesh shall see the salvation of God.” (Luke 3:4,6) John is preparing the way for the Lord. In the process, he is using the gifts God has granted to him.

God has blessed each of us with various gifts. Among them are talents. Think about a few of the gifts and talents God has given to you.

Next, think of or picture the Lord. What 3 adjectives or characteristics come to mind?

Sometimes in prayer, there can be a tendency to be more attentive to what we are thinking than what we are feeling. It is helpful to be aware of both thoughts and feelings and to bring both into prayer.

Take time now to enter into prayer. Ask the Lord to show you how and where you might use the gifts/talents you named above in ways that encompass more fully the 3 adjectives or characteristics of the Lord that you named. Notice what you are thinking and feeling as you pray.

After allowing sufficient time, bring your prayer to a close with a silent Amen or another gesture of gratitude and acknowledgment of the sacred exchange that you have had. Consider repeating this prayer in the days to come.

John the Baptist appeared, preaching in the desert of Judea
and saying, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand!”
It was of him that the prophet Isaiah had spoken when he said:
A voice of one crying out in the desert,
Prepare the way of the Lord,
make straight his paths.
John wore clothing made of camel’s hair
and had a leather belt around his waist.
His food was locusts and wild honey.
At that time Jerusalem, all Judea,
and the whole region around the Jordan
were going out to him
and were being baptized by him in the Jordan River
as they acknowledged their sins.

When he saw many of the Pharisees and Sadducees
coming to his baptism, he said to them, “You brood of vipers!
Who warned you to flee from the coming wrath?
Produce good fruit as evidence of your repentance.
And do not presume to say to yourselves,
‘We have Abraham as our father.’
For I tell you,
God can raise up children to Abraham from these stones.
Even now the ax lies at the root of the trees.
Therefore every tree that does not bear good fruit
will be cut down and thrown into the fire.
I am baptizing you with water, for repentance,
but the one who is coming after me is mightier than I.
I am not worthy to carry his sandals.
He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire.
His winnowing fan is in his hand.
He will clear his threshing floor
and gather his wheat into his barn,
but the chaff he will burn with unquenchable fire.”

Matthew 3:1-12

Be prepared…

Oftentimes in life it seems that being ready depends on angling or positioning oneself to move ahead, achieve success, gain security and so on. In the quest to do so, it can be easy to become driven and focused on determining the best stance or approach and to work toward that end. However, in the process, life can become unbalanced and the lines between what is good, acceptable, righteous and/or just, and what is not, can become blurred. When that happens, I can lose track of the very thing(s) that led me to begin a particular journey, the desire with which it all began.

Jesus says, “…be prepared.” What does that really mean though?

In my younger years, particularly as an athlete, there were many drills that my teammates and I practiced. The exercises were part of our training aimed to help us to become more skilled, individually and as a team. We were to be prepared, in shape, agile…on our toes…aware and ready to respond to whatever situation may arise on the field or on the court.

Along with all of the training, and of the utmost importance, was for each of us on the team to know our purpose or function. After all, how could any of us be prepared, awake and ready without having a good sense of our individual positions? In addition to a role in a particular position, each of us needed to be mindful and attentive to the fact that we were a team. There was more than each of us and our individual positions, and we all needed to be ready to back each other up, sometimes sliding over temporarily to another position to protect the goal or to defend the perimeter.

In every day life, it can be much the same in that it is important for me to know who I am and what my role is both individually and in a broader sense as a member of a wider community. How can I be ready and faithful without a connection to, or deeper sense of, who I truly am and the role to which I have been, or may be, called?

In sports there was always a sense of protecting or guarding each other, the team and especially our home turf. It all started though, or was rooted in, a strong sense of identity. And, while it was related to team and winning, it was so much more than that, requiring each of us to be flexible, to keep learning, to re-evaluate and reassess. We needed to look within in relation to what was happening on and around the field or court throughout each day, each game, each season and each year. Deep down it was about not letting one’s house be broken into. It was about the faith, commitment and dedication on which each of us is built; something inside of each of us while at the same time bigger than each of us, enabling us to be ready, awake and prepared.

Jesus said to his disciples:
“As it was in the days of Noah,
so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.
In those days before the flood,
they were eating and drinking,
marrying and giving in marriage,
up to the day that Noah entered the ark.
They did not know until the flood came and carried them all away.
So will it be also at the coming of the Son of Man.
Two men will be out in the field;
one will be taken, and one will be left.
Two women will be grinding at the mill;
one will be taken, and one will be left.
Therefore, stay awake!
For you do not know on which day your Lord will come.
Be sure of this: if the master of the house
had known the hour of night when the thief was coming,
he would have stayed awake
and not let his house be broken into.
So too, you also must be prepared,
for at an hour you do not expect, the Son of Man will come.”
– Matthew 24:37-44

It’s Never Too Late…

Many years ago, a friend gave me a potted plant cut from one of her growing, flourishing plants. Although I had an appreciation for flowers and plants, I was not a gardener by even the most basic definition of the word. Still though, I was grateful for this gift in a number of ways ranging from the spirit of generosity with which the plant was given to me to the affect its growth had on my growth.

Initially, I placed the plant on the windowsill in my work office and was sure to water it appropriately. However, over the weeks it was not growing as one might expect. One day, toward the end of the workday, I looked at the plant wondering why it was not getting any bigger; it had light and water. I remember thinking for a moment, “maybe I’m not as good at being nurturing as I need to be.” My heart sank at the thought.

Then as I sat there, I looked out the window and had another thought, “It’s okay, you can learn.” I went home that day and continued to think about the plant and the thoughts I had had. The next day, I moved the plant to another spot in the office, I gently cleaned its leaves and I think I even talked to it. I continued to water it and care for it (turning the pot to make sure all of it was getting light and occasionally changing the location of it and wiping its leaves off) and as I did I found myself connecting to it more consciously as a living thing than as an object or obligation.

My plant began to grow and one day my friend stopped by, saw the plant and offered to re-pot it for me as she noticed the pot was getting too small. Despite her being a seasoned gardener, she was so gracious and gentle in the way she offered. I learned because of it.

I often think back to that experience as one that renewed and brought forth new life in many ways. As I think about it today, I find it interesting how it could have gone so differently. The plant could have died. I could have just decided I was not a nurturer in response to the realization of a shortcoming. Most of all, it makes me think about how it’s never too late to be delivered from anything that might be holding us back.

“Deliverer” performed by Matt Maher
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2pb_DT0MhY0)

I was a drifter, I had nowhere to go
I was hanging by threads of dust and bone
Every angel I knew was singing son come home
But the melody was hard to sing along

Oh God, You’re my deliverer
The One, the One who carries us
Oh God, You’re my deliverer

I was on trial for everything I did
And there’s no way I could make a stand and win
When you realize the verdict is already in
You let go of the brokenness within
Well there’s only One who can ever stand and win

Oh God, You’re my deliverer
The One, the One who carries us
Oh God, You’re my deliverer
The One, the One who carries us

And now I’m like a child at night
Who never has to think of why
We’re free to love and live and die
And there’s no need to justify
The sinner that’s inside of me
Has lost all his control of me

My God, from the flood and from the fire
You brought me out, I am alive
With a faith, just like a child
I’m not afraid, I’m running wild
For everything that will be done
I am yours and you are my

Deliverer
The One, the One who carries us
God, You’re my deliverer
The One, the One who carries us
Oh God, You’re my deliverer
The One, the One who carries us
Oh God, You’re my deliverer
The One, the One who carries us
God, You’re my deliverer

I was hanging by threads of dust and bone

—————————————————————

Matt Maher, Bo Rineheart, Bear Rineheart
© 2015 Sony/ATV Tree Publishing / I Am A Pilgrim Songs (BMI) / Bronco Music (BMI) (Adm. by Bluewater Music) / Holy Smoking Gun Music (BMI) (Adm. by Bluewater Music)

redtree_deliverer

Remembrance…

Earlier in the week, I was at a gathering where the person speaking asked everyone to close their eyes and think of someone they knew and whom they considered a saint. Next, we were asked what qualities the person had that made us think of them as a saint. Then, we were asked what we might need to do to have more of that quality in ourselves.

I found it to be a particularly interesting exercise. This is mostly because I immediately thought of two people, both of whom are still alive. I found myself thinking, “Oops,” upon realizing that the speaker meant for us to think of people who had passed away. However, my mea culpa ended up being quite fruitful.

I am convinced that it was not a coincidence that the people who came to mind are still alive, not only that, but also that neither of them would consider themselves saintly by a long stretch. The thing is that while none of us is perfect, all of us have qualities that are good and holy…saintly. Some days they may shine more brightly than other days, but the hope is that as we go along they shine more often or with greater steadiness.

Continuing with the meditation, as I sat there I could envision the faces of so many people, both those living and those now deceased that God has placed around me and with me. How awe-inspiring it was. I could not help but think that there are and have been so many good people, not only in my life, but also in the world. There have also been less than kind-hearted people, but still positive things have come from most of those experiences. More than anything, it seems that there are so many examples of goodness, and each time we experience one, we are blessed. It can be easy to forget that.

November is typically a month of thanksgiving and remembrance. With each day, and as the seasons change and the years pass, it is always good to remember and be thankful.