Relationship

Connecting the pieces…

puzzlepieces2

A year or so ago, and over the course of a number of weeks, I was in the waiting area of a medical center for a portion of each weekday morning. On the way to the waiting area there was coffee, hot water for tea, and small packages of graham crackers and salted crackers. The waiting area itself had chairs, a TV and magazines like most waiting areas, but it also had a table with a partially completed puzzle on it and all the remaining small pieces, also waiting.

I remember arriving each morning and after a short period of time, looking to see how much more of the puzzle was left to be done and how many pieces I might locate and place in the time that I was waiting. At first, this was how I spent at least a portion of my half hour wait each day. Then, as the weeks progressed there were more people in the waiting area and I found my time less and less filled with finding and placing pieces of the puzzle and more filled with conversation between and amongst fellow wait-ers. Those who were once strangers became familiar over a short period of time.

It is interesting how our lives intersect with the lives of others. And how, even over a brief period of time or through a short exchange, we can affect each other’s lives.

Each lifetime is the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.
For some there are more pieces.
For others the puzzle is more difficult to assemble.
Some seem to be born with a nearly completed puzzle….

But know this. You do not have within yourself
All the pieces to your puzzle…

Everyone carries with them at least one and probably
Many pieces to someone else’s puzzle.
Sometimes they know it.
Sometimes they don’t.

                      – from “Eyes Remade for Wonder” by Rabbi Lawrence Kushner

As I continue to sit with the memory of that waiting area, I recall how it felt as if time was suspended or even ceased to exist. There was a reverence in the air as we listened to one another and shared conversation and laughter as we waited. It was as if we were on holy ground. A pleasant surprise…

Recently, I attended an 80th birthday party, and while it was much noisier than the waiting area of that medical center over a year ago, there was also a reverence in the room. At one side of the room there was a slideshow of pictures from throughout the years. As I sat and watched the pictures from old to new, seeing both family and friends…those who had passed and those who were present, sadness was replaced with gratitude as I was reminded…How precious life is! There was a feeling of holy ground in the pictures and in the room in the hugs and kisses, and in the smiles, greetings and conversations that were exchanged during the celebration of a “piece,” a special and beloved piece, that belongs to the puzzle of each of us present at the party, whether in spirit or in person.

So, I praise God as I say thank you Auntie D. for your beautiful spirit, your love, and your example throughout a lifetime. And, thank you to the nurses, technologists and patients in the waiting area of that medical center for your hospitality, sharing and caring during a short and uncertain period of time.

Each and every piece of the puzzle no matter the shape, size, or length is a gift, or has a lesson that is a gift. Sometimes that is easier to see than at other times. Either way, whether we see it now, or later, one spirit bowing to another is always a beautiful thing.

Tradition, Tradition…Tradition!

A number of years ago I went to see a production of Fiddler on the Roof at a local theatre. Since then, every so often I catch the movie, usually at some point after the beginning or midway thru, on television. In fact, it has become somewhat of a regular occurrence for me to see or listen to at least part, if not all, of Fiddler on the Roof once or twice a year…Ah, tradition!

As this past year wound down and we moved from Thanksgiving through New Year’s Day, tradition has been very much in the air. I guess it is every year though. However, as I live and breathe, and think about tradition, I cannot help but “feel” tradition.

Tradition is so much more than the same thing over and over, and over. The heart and soul of it is the spirit of it…the sentiment, memories and feelings that accompany tradition. It is not all about keeping everything the same as it was before, but rather about coming together in the same spirit as before.

Continuing to ponder tradition, I envision the lighting of the torch at the Olympic Games. While the games always start with the lighting of the torch and end with the extinguishing of the flame, these two events and pretty much everything in between are never really the same from one Olympic Games to another. The location, costumes, and uniforms change. Sometimes variations are made to the rules or scoring rubrics and events are added or dropped.

As I sit with this image, it seems to me that one surefire way to kill a tradition is to keep it unchanged, year after year, after year. As time goes by, the focus may shift from the spirit of the tradition to the material of the tradition (the things and steps involved in making it all happen the same way). When that happens, the Spirit is shutout and the decline begins. Then tradition cannot help but lose what makes it special, becoming rote and more of a chore than something to which one looks forward or wants to embrace and celebrate.

Simply put, without substance and without room for change or growth, anything, even the most cherished tradition, will eventually become extinct. All things evolve.

“Tradition, which is always old, is at the same time ever new because it is always reviving – born again in each new generation, to be lived and applied in a new and particular way…Tradition nourishes the life of the spirit; convention merely disguises its interior decay.” – Thomas Merton

OlympicTorch

Star of Wonder…

One of my favorite Christmas songs since childhood is “We Three Kings of Orient Are” by John Henry Hopkins, Jr.

I recall singing this song as a child from this small book of Christmas Carols.

ChristmasCarolBook

While the book is worn and yellowing from the years, it still brings back memories of peace, joy, and hope from Christmases past; it also brings forth some sadness in the missing of loved ones who have since passed on. Overall, though, I feel grateful for the many blessings along the way. So many of them, especially from my youth, I could only see after the fact and through hindsight.

Now though, as I remember all that has been and look at all that is in front of me, I am better able to see it for what it was, and what it is. By the Light of God, I see, and am touched most deeply by, the heart of the matter; the sentiment behind each gift, each act, each word. While sometimes the sentiment is one that is not of love and goodwill, and may be painful to receive, when I look at the Light, in time, I am able to move through that pain toward peace, hope and joy once more. When I allow the Light to grow and burn more brightly within me, I am better able to cherish each moment with love and care.

In a society that is constantly screaming, “Bigger! Better! More!,” the 12 days of Christmas are such an opportune time to slow down and to take time to reflect…to seek and to find or re-find the light of the Star and follow it.

O Star of wonder, star of night
Star with royal beauty bright
Westward leading, still proceeding
Guide us to Thy perfect light.

IMG_1556

What came before is important to what is now, and what is to come…

“Those who cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” – George Santayana

When I was a teenager learning to drive a car, I attended driving lessons. The instructor talked about the importance of leaving oneself an out. That is, time and space to respond safely to both the expected and the unexpected along the way. He spoke about leaving at least a car length (more when traveling at higher speeds) between one’s car and the car ahead. He also taught about being aware of what is in front of oneself as well as using the side and rearview mirrors. Then, of course, he spoke of the times, when looking back over the shoulder, is necessary.

It seems like navigating the road of life is very similar; best done with a broad spectrum, using both central vision and peripheral vision…And, sometimes, needing to turn around, and look back.

At times looking back and remembering the past can bring a smile to one’s face as people, places, events and things experienced along the way come to mind. However, sometimes looking back can be painful. Either way, recalling yesterdays can be immensely helpful in moving forward in a positive way.

While some may say that history is just that, history, and that it should be left in the past, history can play such an important part in guiding one through the present and into a brighter future. With careful consideration and prayerful reflection, the past can illuminate and open up the road ahead.

“History is a vast early warning system.” – Norman Cousins

History is not only important and essential to reflect on so that I do not repeat past mistakes, but also in keeping perspective and holding onto the truths that I have learned, the truth of who I am, and how I desire and strive to be as I navigate the world. While I certainly do not want to stay, or live, in the past, recalling it and, if necessary, working to be at peace with it is essential to growth and authenticity. I cannot forge ahead with a sense of freedom, peace and openness to being led by the Spirit, if I avoid or recoil from the past and any loose ends that it may hold.

We all have loose ends, things that get in the way or cause us to speak or act in ways that are less than a genuine reflection of who we really are at the core of our being. When these loose ends pop up here or there, how do I respond? Do I push them back down, trying to squash them into the hole from which they sprang? Or, do I spend time with them? Do I try to look more closely and work through them so that their potential for wreaking havoc or causing unrest or anxiety becomes less and less each time they arrive, eventually becoming so minute that it is as if they have faded away or vanished completely? In this way, holding and looking back at the past can lead to it becoming a salve or a balm; helping to heal old wounds so that I do not become stuck along the path that I am currently on in the journey of life.

In addition, history often helps to give greater meaning to our lives. It helps us to know who we are and from where we have come. The past can also help us to appreciate more fully the present as well as to know what to hold on to and of what to let go. Knowing where I come from, what and why I do the things that I do and celebrate the occasions that I celebrate, is important. If I do not recall the history of these things or events every so often, over time, they will lose at least some of their meaning, and eventually they may become lost entirely. For some things that may be a good thing, but for others, it may not, especially if they have anything to do with core values and beliefs that create a sense of peace and unity within myself and flowing out into my daily interactions.

You see, when we lose touch with history, avoid it, or allow it to be erased or re-written, we risk losing touch with Truth, both our own and that of humanity. We also risk drifting away from fully becoming all that we were created to be and all, that deep down, we truly desire to be. When we are focused solely on what lies ahead, we are as George Santayana said, “doomed.”

“Prayer is listening to the voice of the One who calls you the beloved. It is to constantly go back to the Truth of who we are and claim it for ourselves. I’m not what I do. I’m not what people say about me. I’m not what I have. My life is not rooted in the world, the things the world gives me. My life is rooted in the truth of my spiritual identity. Whatever we do — we have to go back regularly to that place of core identity.” – Henri Nouwen

The Eye of the Beholder…

UpsideDownIMG_1486      RightSideUpIMG_1486

Sometimes right side up or upside down does not matter. Sometimes either way can make sense or be beautiful…either way can be a good thing.

I wonder how often people are discouraged, turned away or dismissed as not having the “right stuff” simply because of another’s inability to look beyond a piece(s) of the entire picture.

There is a saying about not judging a person by their appearance, but in this Year of Mercy, what about not judging a person, period? The thing is that no matter what I see in someone, or know of someone, I am not them. I do not know every step they have walked and what those steps have been like, and most importantly, I do not know what is in their hearts.

In addition, no matter how much I think I might know, the fact of the matter is, that I (we) very rarely have the whole picture. Without that, without taking the time to inquire and to look more closely, all we really have are assumptions and judgments, and all they do is limit the openness we have to another and the gifts he or she brings to this world. For all we know, we are holding each other back from being all we can be, and certainly, that must have a collective effect.

“Everybody can be great…because anybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

Imagine a world where everyone replaced time spent judging, assessing and competing with one another with time spent encouraging, helping one another and sharing our gifts, talents, time, and treasure…our faith, hope, and love. The times in which we live would be drastically different. The world would be on fire!

While one may think, “Fantasy!” They may be right. It may seem, and probably is, too idealistic and highly unlikely for such a change to occur throughout the world, by what seems like the hands of a few. However, it is not impossible.

It all starts with faith…faith in God, in oneself and in each other. We are created in God’s image. Surely, God’s grace rests upon us and is within us. It enables us to see clearly…to see the whole picture and makes us capable of having hearts that are wide like God’s mercy.

Lord, in this Year of Mercy, and beyond, help us to set the world on fire with hearts more deeply rooted in You.

There’s a wideness in God’s mercy
like the wideness of the sea;
there’s a kindness in his justice,
which is more than liberty.

There is welcome for the sinner,
and more graces for the good;
there is mercy with the Savior;
there is healing in his blood.

There is no place where earth’s sorrows
are more felt than in heaven;
there is no place where earth’s failings
have such kind judgment given.

There is plentiful redemption
in the blood that has been shed;
there is joy for all the members
in the sorrows of the Head.

For the love of God is broader
than the measure of man’s mind;
and the heart of the Eternal
is most wonderfully kind.

If our love were but more faithful,
we should take him at his word;
and our life would be thanksgiving
for the goodness of the Lord.

— Frederick William Faber

 

 

 

 

Hope and Light in Darkness…

This week I had the opportunity to share in an experience called an Advent spiral walk. The evening started with hot cider and light fare followed by song, beautifully led by acoustic guitar and, at first by the voice of one singing, and then several. As it progressed, and we bundled up and walked outside, into the evening, it only got better.

In the cold air and in darkness, guided only by candlelight, we proceeded to reflect on Advent, a time of waiting…waiting in darkness…but also in hope. As we sat around the spiral, singing, “In the Advent Garden, Dark the night below, Earth is waiting, waiting, waiting for the stars to glow…oh,” and as I listened to the guitar chords and the voices, I found myself so taken with the beauty of it all. One by one, each person…each pilgrim…stood up and prayerfully walked the spiral to the center. Once there, he or she, paused, lit their candle, and then placed it along the path on the walk back out from the center.

As I looked up at the stars above, and then back to the group and the spiral, looking at the area that was once dark now becoming lighter, I found myself filled with hope and joy. As I reflected on the words spoken earlier, “the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it” (from John 1:5), I found myself feeling grateful to God for the light placed within each of us and for each person in my life, and along my journey, who has shared their light with me and others.

How wonderful! Even in the darkness, there is light. Advent…waiting with hope and in hope…it is not just this time of year, but also throughout the year. Sometimes I wonder, am I waiting for God or, is it God who is waiting for me? Sometimes, I think it is both.

Either way, whether I am waiting for God or God is waiting for me…the sun always returns, and the light returns, as we wait together.

“Thus says the Lord GOD,
the Holy One of Israel:
O people of Zion, who dwell in Jerusalem,
no more will you weep;
He will be gracious to you when you cry out,
as soon as he hears he will answer you.
The Lord will give you the bread you need
and the water for which you thirst.
No longer will your Teacher hide himself,
but with your own eyes you shall see your Teacher,
While from behind, a voice shall sound in your ears:
‘This is the way; walk in it,’
when you would turn to the right or to the left.”  – Is 30:19-21

To Have Faith Like Abraham…

It’s interesting to start out in one direction only to end up in another. The drawing below started out as a broken heart, as I pondered and sat with the sadness I felt over situations around me. However, the more I sat and drew, the more at peace I felt. And when I was done, and it came time for a title, as I looked at the drawing, all I could think was “Abraham.”

The Book of Genesis reveals many trials and tribulations as well as triumphs. Within its pages is the story of the man who started out as Abram, but ended up as Abraham. And while he, like any human being, was not perfect, his life and relationship with God serves as a great example; both are marked by perseverance, faithfulness, and trust. Abraham sought to do the Lord’s will…to do right by God.

Despite the circumstances around him, Abraham was able to see what God had done for him, how God had provided for him, and how God had been with him. To look at Abraham’s life is to see the light of God shining in, shining through, and filling up the holes created by human experience.

Even in his own failings, or perceived failings, Abraham chose God…chose life, time after time. With Abraham, there was always room for God, for the desire for God and to do right by God. There was a confidence, hope and trust that was constant; there was also a sense of freedom. Abraham knew who he was before God and allowed God to help him as he strove to embrace and live out his part of salvation history.

“Abraham” – “The father of many.” To have faith like Abraham…to allow God to shine in us, through us, and beyond us, wherever we go.

FaithLikeAbraham

 

Take Flight and Soar…

If today you hear God’s voice, harden not your hearts. – Psalm 98:5

While I was searching for a photo, I came across a few that one of my brothers-in-law had taken and sent to the family a couple of years ago…an eagle taking flight.

Looking at the images, “God is in charge.” These are the words that pop into my mind. Such a freeing thought. God is in charge. God who created the eagle and not only gave it wings to fly, but also to soar. As I ponder how magnificent it is to see the eagle take flight and soar, I believe that God has the same in mind for all creation. How inspiring, filled with hope, and so grateful to God it makes me feel.

There is excitement as I step in to all that this day holds, both the known and the unknown. I wonder, “Will I recognize the gifts and blessings around me in the midst of all that is on my plate today? How will I cooperate with God?” Then I stop myself. I call myself back to the eagle in flight, about to soar, and I think, “Let go and let God.” How freeing!

eagle1eagle3eagle4

Photos courtesy of DMB

When Truth Comes…

Sometimes it can be hard to know what the right thing, the good thing, to do in a situation is…And sometimes, it can be even harder to do that thing.

Growing up, I remember singing a hymn at church that had the words, “All of you who have been baptized in Christ, have put on Christ. Alleluia.” It was one of my favorite hymns. I recall singing the words in English, Greek and Arabic during liturgy.

What I remember most, though, are the feelings that were evoked and how deeply touched my soul was as I was singing alongside fellow parishioners. There was no organ or instruments (although I have come to appreciate and enjoy their presence in the years since).  Just a church full of people responding and singing, and it seemed everyone was responding and singing. How good and uplifting it was…the Truth proclaimed and fully alive…Spirit so present.

As I reflect on that time and on doing the right thing, the good thing, now, I think about what it means to me to be created in the image of God and to be a disciple. I believe with all of my heart and all of my soul that despite what the world around me may think or say, or even do, I am called to do the right thing and I have been given (we all have been given) the gifts to do so. It is a call from birth, and my faith and religious tradition tell me it has been sealed through Baptism, and that through God’s grace I am capable of answering that call, doing what is right, no matter what the circumstances.

I remind myself of my experience when I pray about a situation honestly and with openness. That is, when I pour my heart out to God, sharing more than what I would like to see or how I would like to see it…Sharing all my thoughts, hopes and fears, with a heart that desires to do right by God, more than anything else, the path for me to take becomes very clear.

Sometimes the path calls me to say, “No. I will not go along.” Calling me to stand up and speak up, loud and clear, in the name of love, truth, mercy and justice. I need to trust that God, who led me to it, will see me through it, and even though it may be difficult and may cause discomfort or pain, I need to do it, because it is the right thing, the good thing, to do. In doing it, I am brought back to singing that hymn as a child…How good and uplifting it is…the Truth proclaimed and fully alive…Spirit so present. Alleluia!

“Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, as in all wisdom you teach and admonish one another, singing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” – Col 3:16-17

Finding a Rhythm…

When our children were young, one of the books my husband and I used to read to them was Zin! Zin! Zin! A Violin! by Lloyd Moss with illustrations by Marjorie Priceman. The storyline introduced, with a flair that was intriguing, ten instruments that make up a chamber group. The words and illustrations used to describe each instrument with its different look, sound, and feel, awakened the imagination and the senses. By the end, one could easily envision being in the audience, attending the performance.

Each instrument is capable of creating sound on its own; acceptable maybe even wonderful, but one-dimensional. When together, embraced and celebrated along with the others, different as they may look, sound and feel they are so much more. They are enhanced not only by the existence of the others, but also by the cooperation and co-laboring with them. The brass, string, and woodwind instruments are all necessary parts to create the movement, the music…the melody and harmony of the chamber group.

While there is a conductor “running the show,” he or she is not the one who brought the group of musicians together. It was love of music that brought the entire group, conductor included, together. It all started with Love…it all started with a Word.

It is what binds the group together and propels them forward. It is what enables them to sit side-by-side, working together with respect, courtesy, and dignity, listening to each other, adjusting to each other, and allowing each other to play their individual instruments together, making music instead of cacophony…Taking all that came before and making a bridge from the past to the present as they move toward the future…Taking all that they have learned and experienced, making room for the new and/or different that each has to offer, becoming stronger, better, and richer in sound, and in character.

Any one musician can use his or her instrument to make noise, but for the chamber group to make music everyone in the group needs to be in sync with each other. Everyone in the group needs to be guided more by their love of music than their love of their particular instrument.

“In the beginning was the Word,
and the Word was with God,
and the Word was God.”
– John 1:1